stress

Carers Group in Lostwithiel

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Carers Group LostwithielIf you are a carer there is a good chance your daily experiences may involve a cocktail of stressful feelings such as anger, resentment, guilt, fear etc and we all know what that does to us long term.

I’ve witnessed many ‘support’ groups where people get together and share their problems, but then get stuck in that negative energy. I’ve known people who have said they have walked out of support groups feeling worse than when they walked in. A problem shared is not always a problem halved.

So this group will be different, because we will be using techniques in a group setting so that everyone can relax and let go of any unhelpful emotions. Techniques such as Emotional Freedom Technique, that can be really effective in a group setting. My aim will be for people to leave feeling empowered, feeling more able to cope than when they walked in.

The group will be restricted to around five people per meeting at first, so that we can bond and make a connection. It will also be easier to teach EFT in a small group. Ultimately I’m looking to create a group of around 10 people who can come to meetings as they need. You will need to ‘book’ a place, but this will be possible via the private Facebook page as well as phone etc.

This is a new idea and will be up and running once I know who wants to attend.

You can let me know if you are interested by leaving a message on 01579 308232 (Because of the nature of my one-to-one work I rarely pick up, but always return calls and answer messages etc), sending an email, or contacting my via FaceBook

Can you get a better nights sleep and improve your health and happiness?

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Is your mind busy when it’s time to rest and sleep? Do you have problems switching off at bedtime? Mind active and won’t slow down? Do you toss and turn because your thoughts won’t let you rest?

If that image of being too restless to sleep sounds like you, you have a lot in common with many of  the people I help and there is a good chance your flight or fight response is active.

What is this about?

So lets talk about one way to switch off the fight or flight response and quieten the mind down at bedtime. There are many ways to achieve this, and one I really like is to keep a gratitude journal.

Spending a few minutes each night to think about things you are really grateful for is a great way to calm the mind and body and trigger the relaxation response. Focusing on the things you have been grateful for during the day will help you to let go of the things that were worrying you and help you get a good nights sleep.

But you do need to do it properly; robotically going through things you think you should be grateful for is not the same! If you are aware of the work of Candace Pert, you will know that your thoughts trigger the release of chemicals that flood the body, but that does not really happen if you think the thoughts in a detached fashion. You need to think the thoughts with your heart too.

Why is this Important?

It is really important that the fight or flight response is turned off and the relaxation response is triggered for sleep. Normally during sleep our bodies and minds should go through cycles of healing and repair, but these cycles are associated with being in a relaxed state. When we are stressed they are put on hold and your body does not heal and repair as it should.

So if you want to be healthy and happy triggering the relaxation response just before sleep will help.

It seems odd to think we can be stressed while sleeping, but studies have shown that some people, like those with CFS/ME, do actually stay stressed during their sleep.  So spending a few minutes contemplating what you are grateful for or what has gone well during the day is one way to switch off the fight or flight response.

Gratitude is great because it focuses you on what you have, not what you want or what you would like. I buy a nice little note pad for those that take part in my workshops, so they can use it as a journal and I urge you to buy something special too. Having a nice book to write in and maybe a nice pen will make the activity special and keep you motivated.

How do I Use This?

“I didn’t expect to recover from my second operation but since I did, I consider that I’m living on borrowed time. Every day that dawns is a gift to me and I take it in that way. I accept it gratefully without looking beyond it. I completely forget my physical suffering and all the unpleasantness of my present condition and I think only of the joy of seeing the sun rise once more and of being able to work a little bit, even under difficult conditions.” ― Henri Matisse

Personally I would prefer a paper based journal as modern technology like phones tend to keep us stimulated, alert and possibly stressed. Much better to create your own paper based journal which can become a treasure trove of positivity for you, as it fills with things that you have been grateful for. Something like this is ideal.

Spend a little bit of time composing your thoughts and then write down what you have been grateful for today. Feel the feelings as deeply as possible with your heart.

One lady I was talking too, said how truly grateful she felt for the home she lived in, even though it was nowhere near as nice as she would like. This was something she had moaned about and criticised until hearing of a tragedy the other side of the world where people had lost their homes and were spending night outside. Another lady spent ages trying to think of something only to realise she was grateful for the comfortable warm bed she was laying in.

Another chap said he thought of a different person he knew each night, spending time remembering how they have or had positively contributed to his life. It’s a good thing to vary what you write to keep it fresh and relevant.

Sometimes when times are tough, or we are busy and tired it is easy to answer with our head only. You know what I mean, when you say something but it does not have that emotional resonance, that physical sensation that lets you know you have felt something with your heart. Notice the difference between thinking what you are grateful for and feeling it with your heart. It can help to place your hand on your heart and allow the thoughts of gratitude to flow from there.

I wonder if you maybe surprised at what you have been grateful for today?

Resources
The power of gratitude

10 Reasons Why Gratitude is Good for You

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Do One Thing to Lower Your Blood Pressure Right Now…

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which may also help to:breth2

  • raise the efficiency of your breathing,
  • improve your ability to solve problems,
  • improve sleep
  • encourage a calmer emotional state
  • calm an agitated mind and
  • boost your thinking

What is this miraculous thing…?
Well, its not some hi-tech pharmaceutical drug or some prohibitively expensive course of therapy on some tropical island; its actually free, easy to do and at the tip of your nose.  Its called Alternate Nostril Breathing and its a its a method of breathing that is so very easy to do in only a few minutes a day, but which has some amazing health benefits.

Why is it Important? Alternate Nostril Breathing has been performed by Yogis for millennia.  In Sanskrit, this method of breath control is called Nadi Shodhana and it involves unilaterally breathing through the right and then left nostril. However, the power of this form of breathing has only relatively recently come to the attention of Western cultures. Research in the late 90′s showed that Alternate Nostril Breath improved the balance of activity between the left and right brain hemispheres.  We have learned that breathing through the right nostril fires up the sympathetic nervous system and left hemisphere of the brain, whilst breathing through the left nostril activates the and right hemisphere of the brain and the parasympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for the relaxation response. Practiced (once or thrice) daily for a few minutes, your mind will become clearer.

 

So what do you need to do?  Well…

  • Sit comfortably, ideally on the floor to ground and centre yourself.
  • To prepare, gently place your right thumb against your right nostril and your ring finger against your left nostril.
  • Breathe normally
  • Then press your thumb against the side of your right nostril to close it and breathe slowly in through your left nostril.  Then close your left nostril by pressing on the side of your nose with your ring finger whilst releasing your right nostril and slowly breathe out through your right nostril.
  • Then breathe in through your right nostril, close it with  your thumb and then release your finger from the side of your left nostril and breathe out through your left nostril.
  • Continue in this manner for as long as is comfortable.

Whilst my wife Debbie was recovering from, she used this method of relaxation regularly to help balance and clear her mind and also felt the practice helped her to deal with anxiety and stressful thoughts about her condition and her future.  It only takes a few moments each day but I think the results are far reaching 🙂  Do let me know how you get on with it and what benefits you experience by commenting below 🙂

Pete

SkyBlueRiver.co.uk

References

IMMEDIATE EFFECT OF ‘NADI -SHODHANA PRANAYAMA’ ON SOME SELECTED PARAMETERS OF CARDIOVASCULAR, PULMONARY, AND HIGHER FUNCTIONS OF BRAIN N.K. Subbalakshmi, S.K. Saxena, Urmimala, and Urban J.A. D’Souza

What Every Health Conscious Woman Needs to Know about Stressors and Why!

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Pete Mulford Therapy and Coaching for Better Health

This is the next webinar in our series of FREE webinars that we are offering. I really hope you will register now because this webinar is packed full of information that could change your life for the better.

Knowledge is power they say and I’m sure you will gain a lot of knowledge from this webinar. It is a vital piece of the health puzzle whether you are ill or not and used to be a part of our attendance programme for those suffering from CFS, ME and PVFS. We have yet to meet anyone who has been diagnosed with those conditions who does not have stress in their lives, but few understand the very detrimental effect it has on their physical health. The very process of being diagnosed with one of these conditions is extremely stressful for most people.

Part of the problem is that the intangible phenomenon we call stress, has become an insidious part of western living. More than 40 million of us living in the UK admit to suffering from some form of stress. In fact, only 17% of us state that stress does not have an impact on our lives. But even those that do believe stress has impact are often amazed at the sheer depth of the physical effects that stressors can have.

So to help you understand the full implication of stress we explain the three main reasons why stressors damage your health. This webinar will allow you to make knowledgeable choices and fully understand how reducing your stress will improve your capacity for physical health. This is one of the key areas in Debbie’s recovery from CFS/ME so we know just how important it is.

If you want to be in more control of your health and imagine a healthier future register now.

Please share the event so as many people as possible will benefit.